I think I just need a buffness mulligan.
FOR THE WEEK.
Did we already talk about Tim’s man cold? I don’t even remember. Well, he had one and apparently it was more than just a man cold because Kellan got sick and neither he (Kellan) or I slept at all on Wednesday night.
I mean, the poor child was awake every 30-45 minutes – screaming.
It was awful. Just awful.
I felt so bad for him because I didn’t know what to do to make him feel better. Each time he woke up, we legit had to walk over to a plant in the master bedroom named Charlie (100% for serious) and let him look at it and touch it to reset his brain. I don’t know what it is about plants but they – and nature in general – always calm him down. Always.
This is Charlie, by the way.
Needless to say, by Thursday morning, I was a zombie.
Thankfully, Tim stayed home yesterday morning (without any prompting from me) (he heard us awake all night) (he felt bad because he didn’t know what to do) (extra bonus points to him for doing what he did) so I could try to sleep (I didn’t) and do things to make me feel human again (like shower) without having to worry about Kellan. Yes, we went to the doctor. Just a cold, thankfully. A nasty one but, still. Whew. He is much better today. He slept all night last night. It is amazing what steam showers, baby Vick’s on the feet, saline drops and a little TLC can do.
I’m really amazed at how much patience I have with Kellan when things like this happen. Endless. My patience is endless. I get frustrated sometimes, sure, but I’m never bemoaning my predicament to anyone all, “THIS CHILD. OMG.”
When Tim had a man cold?
OMG. THIS MAN. IT’S JUST A COLD.
IT’s. JUST. A. COLD.
Endless exclamation points.
On Tuesday, when Tim was sick and it was the worst, allegedly, according to Tim, at one point in the morning I had to remind myself that if *I* was in his situation, I would want sympathy. Not meanness. I went into the guest bedroom where he was housing his pitiful self, and apologized for being all, “OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! IT’S A COLD!!!!!!!!!! ::Stomp, huff, stomp huff, eye roll::”
I have no idea why I’m so…not patient. Not sympathetic.
Maybe it is because my mom wasn’t super sympathetic when we were sick or hurt unless we were REALLY SICK or REALLY HURT.
Meh. You’re fine.
Or, if I was on the basketball court and something happened, I would hear, “You’re fine! GET UP! You’re FINE!”
(and then at some point in high school I learned to drown out her voice so I never really heard anything she said anymore)
I try to calm the crazy, want to scream at the top of my lungs to just suck it up, feeling I get inside but it is super difficult. I really struggle.
I am learning that Tim usually doesn’t complain about anything (hurt, sick, etc) unless it is pretty bad…but unless he literally has a fever and looks like death warmed over – or has blood shooting in all directions – I still have a hard time finding my sympathy.
I think Kellan is helping, though, because now I know what true sympathy really feels like. Sympathy that doesn’t come with thoughts like, “OMG. THIS IS RIDICULOUS.”
I’m actually better at being sympathetic to others because it’s like, “I’m so sorry you’re sick. I hope you feel better! Aw!” because I’m not the one who has to live with them at home and deal with the sickness 24/7. Their sickness is someone else’s job, so I’m all about sympathy because it’s not something I actually have to worry about.
That’s pretty bad, huh?
Like I said, I’m trying…to get better…at my sympathy.
I’m taking on some personal responsibility. Putting on my big girl panties. Oy.
Also? Totally unrelated but Kellan is eight months old today!
Happy eight month birthday, Kellan!!
How did this happen so quickly?!?!?!
This is up at Tim’s parent’s house.