dear kellan – month 3

We’re moving out of the fourth trimester!!! Yay!!!!

I really cannot tell you how excited this makes me. While we were at an impromptu doctor’s visit on May 16th, the pediatrician was all, “Almost three months!” and I was like, “Yay! Out of the fourth trimester!” And then he was all, “And everything gets better after that.”

Well, nothing is bad, really, but things are better as in: you are supposed to kind of “graduate” into wanting to interact with the world instead of seeing it as this big, confusing, sometimes scary place.

By the way, I learned at this doctor’s appointment that you caught your first cold. You had been coughing a bit and had some interesting, yellow, stringy boogers coming out of your nose…and green poo for a week. I would have rather been safe than sorry…though I still feel bad you got sick! Poor boo boo!

It’s been a busy month, so maybe you’re just worn out.

We met new friends, both our neighbors, Brian, Niki and little Luke, who is a little over a year old, along with Charlie and her daughter Annie, who is nine months old. You were really good when Niki held you for the first time and the second time, an impromptu get together in their backyard while they were cooking out, you FELL ASLEEP in her arms! Good job, boo boo!

As for Charlie and Annie, we’ve already had weekly play dates. Sometimes we go to their house and sometimes they come to ours. Either way, you love watching Annie toddle around. I have no idea if you will be like her and start walking and nine months…but whoa if you do. Mommy will never get anything done anymore! You’re already getting so much stronger. We’ve graduated from tummy time on the My Brest Friend (4/26 was the first time you did awesome at tummy time on My Brest Friend) and the Boppy to the floor. I don’t know what happened but one night you tossed and turned and slept horribly…and the next morning during tummy time you popped right up, head totally off the ground instead of the maybe-two-inches off the ground that you had been doing before.

I guess you figured it out…and then bam! Put it into practice.

You still only tolerate being in that position for a few minutes – at best – but at least you are strong enough to get your head all the way up! I’m so proud!

We’ve also gotten into a little routine with nursing. I’m really not sure how conducive it is for me to get anything else done, but at least it helps my still healing perineum get a rest. You love, love, LOVE to lay down and nurse. Once we figured that out…you really want to do that vs anything else. My Brest Friend? Fahghetaboutit. Why have my legs hanging off a nursing pillow when there is a perfectly good bed just calling NEE!!!

Oh, what is nee? It is your very own made up word for the food train (aka my boobies). When you say it, it sounds like knee but in a high-pitched baby voice. When I lay you down on the bed and you realize you’re about to sit down to a five course meal, you’ll start saying it over and over. It goes something like, “Nee! Nee! Nee! Nee!”

You also say “Nee!” when you’re really hungry…but it takes all the guesswork out of what you need, so I’m not complaining.

When we’re “neeing” you started this thing where you will lift up both legs when you’re latching, almost like it’s a requirement. Once “contact” has been made, you put one foot on top of the other and slowly lower them, usually onto my thigh, like it’s your own personal ottoman. You seem to like to put your feet everywhere…on my hands and arms while we’re sitting in the “poopy position” or up against my shin when we’re laying on the floor exercising. Well, you’re exercising. I’m just the referee. And by the way? My shins need a time out from all of that rapid kicking.

Another funny thing happening? Your hair is getting wavy! Your daddy had curly hair as a child, so maybe that’s where it is coming from. You definitely didn’t get that from me. My hair is straight as a stick. A really, really straight stick.

We noticed your hair getting wavy after baths. We’d try to brush it down and pieces just kept popping up every which way no matter what we did. And speaking of baths…you still don’t like them very much. You don’t scream *as* loud but there is still screaming. I took a bath with you (5/9/12) where we both sat in the tub together and you did much better, though you kept arching your back and trying to figure out how not to be in there and at the same time trying to decide if you liked it. It made holding and washing you quite challenging.

Then it was time to get out.

You didn’t like that part at all.

We’ve yet to try another together bath…but we will for sure…maybe when it is a bit easier for you to sit up on your own.

When it comes to sleep…apparently you really don’t need any. Or, at least, you need WAAAAAAAY less than what is considered “average.” At the end of week eight, you stopped giving me a glorious four to six-hour stretch in the beginning and started waking up every 2-3 hours to eat. And because we figured out how to nurse laying down, you started squeegeeing over to me in middle of night to let me know, “Hey! I’m hungry!” Well, Mommy is tired so we end up falling asleep next to each other until the next feeding where I either just stick you right back on the boob or switch sides. One night, a week later, you were wide awake after a feeding because I had to change your diaper. So, because you were awake, you figured you would start talking really loudly and smiling/almost laughing to the point you had me laughing. I kept telling you we needed to go back to sleep…but you had other ideas. Obviously. You did eventually settle down but man! You had me cracking up…at 3am.

We also had a few outings this month. You had your first trip to daddy’s work (5/3/12). Technically, it was a hotel *near* his work because they were doing training that day but, still. You met his work people and did an excellent job, even though I was worried you’d melt down in the hotel lobby. You proved me completely wrong though and you allowed other people to hold you without crying or fussing. You even busted out a few smiles for everyone – what a charmer already!!

You took your first solo outing with daddy to the grocery store and to the Wal-Mart parking lot to drop of a huge bag of documents to shred. We’ve yet to purchase a new shredder since ours broke almost a year ago and our town puts on an annual “shred-a-thon” and we decided to take advantage. Well, you and your daddy took advantage while mommy stayed home and kept herself busy vacuuming and doing laundry so she didn’t have to think about how much she missed you!

This month marked the first time you stayed home alone with daddy, too. Mommy had an appointment with the dermatologist and also stopped on her way home to pick up breakfast (Moe’s Bagels) for her and daddy.

(It is really hard to talk about myself in third person…just so you know)

We’ve also been frequenting the grocery store, mostly because you will only tolerate a few minutes there versus the hour or so it would take to do full on grocery shopping. One afternoon, daddy and I had you in your car seat inside the shopping cart and were checking out using the self scan aisle. Once we got home, we realized we had accidentally stolen eggs and bread because mommy was handing daddy items to scan and then we had an issue with the mushrooms not scanning properly, so mommy had to get someone to help her scan the mushrooms.

That’s when the eggs and bread were forgotten, still in the cart.

Our conscience got the better of us, though and we went back to the store two days later and admitted to customer service that we were thieves. The lady was nice enough to us and said she’d “let it go this time.”

(It’s not like we make it a habit of accidentally stealing anything…….)

Just so you know, honesty is always best policy, even if it is uncomfortable to have to admit you made a mistake. Case in point: daddy wanted you with him when he went to explain what happened with the bread and the eggs instead of me taking you around the store to pick up the few items we needed because he said it made him look less scary and mean to the person he had to speak with about our little fiasco.

And I have a feeling you’ll be speaking before any of us are ready! You’ve been “saying” whole sentences! I know they make complete sense to you, though your daddy and I are still trying to decipher the gah’s and ah’s. You’ve been adding sounds to your repertoire. You seem to be in this pattern of being kind of quiet for a few days and then out of nowhere you start talking up a storm with all these new sounds! You also started clucking your tongue and you will answer us if we ask you a question.

My favorite, though? Your smile…both with your mouth and your eyes. Sometimes your whole face lights up and it melts my heart!

You’ve made some strides in the physical department, too. Now, when we play on the floor to “kick kick kick!” you will roll onto your side if we help by you. You’ll hold onto our fingers and we pull slightly…and over to the tummy you go! You also grab EVERYTHING to put into your mouth. Burp cloths, your Cat in the Hat rattle, my fingers, my hair, your shirt…EVERYTHING. Your favorite, though, is chewing your fingers and hands. You try to either shove as much of your entire hand as possible into your mouth or you test your gag reflex by sticking your first finger or your thumb as far into your mouth as possible. Suffice it to say you still gag yourself…daily.

You also clasp your hands together on your chest and you bat at the (amorphous) rhinoceros and elephant in your bouncer and at the toucan hanging on your play mat. If seem to be more focused on doing that when we’re not watching but if we sneak a peek, you have the most concentrated, serious look on your face. That’s not to say you don’t enjoy time with mommy and daddy, too. You love it when we get really close, face to face, and “chat.” You get the biggest smile on your face as if you’re thinking, “It’s just YOU and ME!”

We’re also working on independence. I think that part is harder on me than it is for you. I’ve started to put you in your crib during the day with your stuffed animals wedged between the top of the crib and the wall. I tell you to talk to your friends while I either lay on the floor and do crunches next to you, put some laundry in the wash or just sit in another room and listen to you jabber away, having a great time. My whole plan with this is to get you used to crib so when we transition you to sleeping in there – in your room – you don’t wake up in an unfamiliar, scary place. After the first day I put you in your crib, I wanted to try putting you in there that same night…but I’m having to learn to be patient and slow with you and with introducing you to new things, so, for now, you and I are still sleeping side by side in the bed.

(I did, however, get you to nap in your crib for about 20 minutes…once. But, hey, that’s something, right?)

You have, though, figured out that snuggling with me during the night versus laying alone is an option…and one that you heavily prefer over all others…so now you’ll somehow worm your way over to me in the middle of the night instead of laying between two rolled up blankets. I still can’t figure out how you move the blanket…

You also seem to prefer laying on your side or almost on your stomach instead of flat on your back. Honestly, I can’t really blame you for that one, since that is exactly how I like to sleep, too. One night after I took Maddie into the guest bedroom to sleep with daddy (she snores…really loudly…) I came back to find you sound asleep almost on your tummy. It kind of freaked me out, mostly because you were swaddled and I was afraid if you rolled over you wouldn’t be able to help yourself move…so instead of letting you peacefully sleep…I picked you up and put you back on your back.

You woke up…and weren’t very happy with me moving you…but I was just trying to make sure you were safe so I’m sure you’ll forgive me…you probably already have.

And to end this month of so many new things, experiences and activities, I have to admit that there are times when I am holding you, trying to put you down for a nap or when you are in the mood just to be held, that I will I get overwhelmed at the magnitude of it all – of you…of the fact that I’m now a mommy…of how much our lives have changed…and I just cry.

The tears are not because I’m sad. I cry because wow. This is real and it’s really happening.

And I love it. Every single minute.

I love you, little man.



1 Response to “dear kellan – month 3”

  1. 1 bevchen May 21, 2012 at 1:37 pm

    3 months. Wow!
    Beautiful post 🙂

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