“stretchy to 3” and daddy dreams

I’m actually *not* going to be pregnant forever!

It’s really coming to an end!

OMG YAY!!!!!!!!!!

If you’ve never been pregnant before, you really have no idea how much of a relief this is, knowing that you’ll actually be able to deflate your basketball belly and walk around without pain again. I mean, sure, we all know that pregnancy WILL END at some point but having an actual “if he doesn’t come by X date” eviction date instead of “whenever it happens………….”


The sprout’s final, absolute deadline to get the hell out?

February 20.

Scary thought of the day: Tim and I will be parents in TEN DAYS OR LESS.

The 20th would put me a 40 weeks, 4 days and I have zero intention of making it that far. During the OB appointment yesterday, I didn’t find out much else other than I was “stretchy to three centimeters” but still effaced the same and baby sprout was still at a -1 station.

Let me tell you, “stretchy to three centimeters” is a painful experience and after going through that, I’m really not all that keen on experiencing a membrane sweep (where they manually separate your bag of water from your cervix), though I’ll get to talk all about one if I make it to our appointment next week.

*But* the rainbow shining through the vajayjay storm?

The OB said she didn’t think I’d make it that far, to 40 weeks.

Please, dear baby Jesus, let her be right.

She also got 700 million brownie points because as she was feeling my belly to feel the sprout she was all, “No fat. All baby.”

(thank God the baby isn’t in my thighs)

After the appointment, I decided to try as many “old wives tale” cervix thinning/labor starting starting ideas I could think to do, like eating pineapple and eggplant and certain “activities” involving Tim.

And I’m doing them again, today, starting with an hour long walk.

Baby sprout, it’s time.


There are a few dates we don’t want the sprout to come, one being Valentine’s Day (this date is more Tim than me) and also this Sunday, the 12th. I know it’s harsh but I really, really don’t want this baby sharing a birthday with my dad. I don’t want to give him (my dad) anything “extra” or “special” to talk about when it comes to the sprout. I feel like he doesn’t deserve it. He shouldn’t get to share a birthday with MY child.

(If you don’t already know, the relationship between my dad and I…isn’t. There is no relationship at all. Some background as to why is here, here and here)

(and God or karma will probably have the sprout born on the 12th just so I have no choice but to get over it)

Anyhow, with this date looming, the idea of sprout being born on the 12th is really starting to get to me.

Last night I had the weirdest dream about my dad.

So, my dream: I was going over to his house to get our dogs, Maddie and Lexi. Why they were even over there in the first place…no idea. So, I get there and Maddie has already thrown up and has diarrhea because he let her eat something she shouldn’t (something about a football….that’s all I remember).

I went on a tirade about them not eating any “people food” EVER and decided I was taking them home.

He got all irritated like I wasn’t allowed to take them and I was saying I didn’t care and there was this woman there and he turned to her and asked if she was also a lawyer (no idea what “else” she was…).

I guess he was going to try and scare me into being….what? Sued? I have no idea. They’re my dogs?….

So I kept going off about how he had no clue how to care for them and they hadn’t had any exercise, yada yada yada.

I stormed out, started getting the car ready and then he comes out with the dogs, my two youngest brothers and the woman to walk them (the dogs).

I stood there, outraged he’d even attempt this and was screaming how he didn’t even know how far they actually needed to walk while he just went down the street, grinning the whole time like, “I’ll show YOU.”

I turned to the woman all, “Seriously, they need to be walked AT LEAST three to five miles”

Then I woke up.

Go ahead, dream interpreters.


(and to everyone else: SEND BABY/GO INTO LABOR JUJU!)


16 Responses to ““stretchy to 3” and daddy dreams”

  1. 1 argonzalez312 February 10, 2012 at 8:55 am

    Watermelon!!! I went over with my first two and its neat that your Dr will only let you only go 4 days!!! I was basically told 42 weeks was the earliest they would even start to plan an induction… so for a baby due on June 20th I was looking at a July 8th date!!!! But the best thing you can do is relax!

    • 2 Jessica February 10, 2012 at 2:26 pm

      Yes! The last fruit!! They’ll go longer than 40+4…but that is the first date they’ll consider and I was ALL ON THAT.

      I’m trying to relax…but it’s not happening very well… 🙂

  2. 3 jobo February 10, 2012 at 9:00 am

    whee baby! come on out, we all want to meet you!!

  3. 6 adewvall February 10, 2012 at 10:20 am

    Woo woo woo! You are SO CLOSE to the finish line! (Or the starting line – however you want to look at it!!!) Think good thoughts, enjoy your ACTIVITIES, and try to enjoy as much sleep as you can ; )

  4. 8 Katherine O. Cooper February 10, 2012 at 11:19 am

    On the dream – some about your tense relationship with your dad…but more about you. I’ve always been told that different parts of dreams are different parts of you and that the most important thing…no matter how you dissect them, is to look at the emotions.

    You have some scary sh*t ahead! I see your dream as being about giving up complete control in a few days…that when the baby starts to come, you will be at the mercy of the process, and to some degree, the medical folk around you.

    Breaking the bag of waters? pshaw. nothin’. And yes, those last few days are so, so painful. I remember it being the worst with our oldest. Large heads just simply don’t belong there.

    Glad I took the time for a read…good luck! Looking forward to an update! Kate

    • 9 Jessica February 10, 2012 at 2:28 pm

      That probably has something to do with it – the anxiety/unknown/etc. Dreams manifest those things in such weird ways!

      I’m with you 100% on the large heads. I’m praying the sprout’s head isn’t TOO big….yikes!

  5. 10 Zannah February 10, 2012 at 11:48 am

    Hey, the 20th is a great day to have a baby! Or at least a great day to be born. I know from experience. 🙂

  6. 12 Sandi Ormsby February 11, 2012 at 8:08 pm

    The time is almost here! I remember those days. My son refused to come. We had to induce and then he refused to get out…had to suction him! My daughter, we induced because my doctor was heading out of town for Christmas and I didn’t want anyone else delivering her. She had no problem with that and came very quickly. In fact, too fast…we had to make her wait for the doctor.

    That is their personality to this day. My son is slow to get ready and doesn’t like to be rushed. (He’s 8) and My daughter, when she makes a decision, her homework packet is done in 10 mintues. (she’s 6) let’s go mom, I’m ready. Wait mommy has to get a shirt on, please and your brother is still walking around in his underwear.

    I swear,their personalities are exactly like they were inside the womb and upon exiting. Make note and see if “Sprout” will be like the day she was born. I swear by it…they already have little personalities inside you.

    Lake Forest, CA

  7. 13 KB February 12, 2012 at 4:19 am

    Ohhh, I am going to break my don’t tell the p) regnant chick your own pregnancy horror stories…sorry, love.

    I had the membrane sweepy thing and omg, worst pain ever. I actually had it twice. Mr. Bold (aka Colton) started his efforts to live outside the womb at 30 weeks. Eek, very uncool little man. Thank goodness science and bedrest and more science and lots more bedrest kept him in until the “safe time” (you know all about that milestone!).

    So 6 days before his scheduled arrival I agreed to such procedure because of all the problems we had with the pregnancy (not sharing these scary details since I gotta kinda stick to my mantra…heh). At any rate, I was like you at this stage of the game. I’ll do ANYTHING to get this bugger out!

    Suffice to say, membrane sweeping = lots of owie. Annnnddd…it didn’t even work the first time! And let me tell you, if it doesn’t work, be ready for some very yucky cramping and bleeding (as if I wasn’t already scared enough people… Geez!)

    So after Mr. Bold’s due date passes, I have my next OB appt the following day. I had already made up my mind = NO MEMBRANE SWEEPING. NOT EVER AGAIN PLEASE AND THANK YOU. (I had, of course after the fact, consulted Dr. Google and learned the statistics for success with said procedure was not all that I had hoped for. So, I was resolute in my decision that my smart, wonderful and very talented OB would have to come up with another way to get little man out of me.

    Yeah, turns out that OB practice doesn’t really push for induction until you are 10-14 days PAST DUE!!! Seriously???? I was only *one*! So, you can tell I wanted that boy out because I, with all my wits about me, agreed to let her try the omg, that f’ing kills membrane sweep again!

    Happy ending this time though because it did work the second time and my body obligingly went into labor a few hours later.

    But honestly, I’m not a big pain baby…can usually take quite a bit, and I cried like a newborn, both times.

    So definitely not trying to tell you what to do, but I’ll not vote for the membrane sweeping until kinda the last resort.

    OK, back to my full on don’t scare the pregnant chick behavior (notice I didn’t give you the gory details of said discussed procedure? See, I can behave!)
    I know this is the hardest time to just roll with it, but maybe the bake timer isn’t up just yet and little man wants to keep developing for all of his allotted 40 weeks.

    Keeping my fingers crossed these last few days are as zen as you guys can muster.

    Your big SIL

  8. 14 Kathleen Reifsnyder February 12, 2012 at 7:47 am

    Our first was born on Valentines day!!! She was due the 5th and Mark’s birthday is the 9th and we thought she might be born then, but she waited until Valentines Day and that was a wonderful Valentines present!!!!!

  9. 15 Breeza February 12, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    Hoping it’s not today or Tuesday!!

  10. 16 bevchen February 13, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    Apparantly you have to eat about 8 pineapples in one sitting for that to work. My tongue would be stinging after ONE!

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