baby tourette’s

FIRST First: I’ve just been called out regarding my lack of posting any how-to-where-did-you-find-it info on the marble ornament things.

Thank YOU, Stephanie.

Anyway, I found the idea here on Not Martha.

And then I ad-libbed the rest.

I bought everything at Michael’s, by the way, including small round holiday stickers to use instead of searching through magazine after magazine to find JUST THE RIGHT SIZE PICTURE.

Stickers are WAY easier and WAY faster.

I picked out which stickers I liked and then stuck the stickers to a piece of red felt.

Then, I used glue from another planet (Liquid Fusion) to attach the marble to the sticker/felt combo.

I waited for them to dry and then cut each one out.

Then?

Then I cut a million pieces of ribbon and then whipped out the handy-dandy glue gun, made Tim my prisoner and created the hangy-loop-thing by putting a dab of hot glue on the back of the marble (make sure your ribbon is straight or else Rudolph will be upside-down!) and Tim would then immediately stick the ribbon down into the glue (he’d be holding the ribbon with two hands, at the ready) and I’d turn it over to make sure it was straight and then WA-LA!

Ornament!

If you have any specific questions (Stephanie) you can email me (Stephanie) so I can make sure you know EXACTLY how it’s done (Stephanie).

You know this is all in good fun (Stephanie).

*****

Now, onto the SECOND First, an apology. I’ve been so slow to respond to your comments…Papa Guy: Italian Peas are basically…top secret…says Tim…unless you’re Italian OR accepted into “The Family”

Well, I’m not Italian, so I don’t think I’m held to the same standard and I’ve never made them before BUT I can tell you they have onions, lots of butter and come from an organic can. Does that help?

Also? Please know I read, cherish and I LOVE each and everyone one of your comments. It means I’m not alone.

And I’d really hate to think that I’m all alone out here.

SIDEBAR: Every time I hear or say that phrase…”I’m all alone out here”…I immediately think of the story of one of Tim’s dogs as a child who got left outside by accident one night and kept making pitiful noises at the door that his mom (and everyone else who heard it) swore it sounded like the dog was all, “I’m awlll along out where!” END SIDEBAR.

Also (this is like the catch up I should have been doing forever ago), I’ve been meaning to thank Nomz over at ruggedgrace for giving me a wonderful ‘Tell Me About Yourself’ award a few weeks ago that I’ve yet to acknowledge.

(partly because I’m supposed to give you seven secrets about me and I’m not even sure what secrets to share…I mean…we talk about my boobs leaking so….)

AND I just found out that the lovely Janice at CountryBoyCityGirls gave me the Most Versatile Blogger award this past week.

Yay! I love awards…of any kind. I’m material that way, I guess.

Thank you both so much! I swear I’ll (try) to get to them as soon as I come up with secrets and random things – neither of which should be hard, technically.

I’m just going to let you know right now that this entire post is going to ramble and make zero sense because I just drank an entire glass of chocolate Ovaltine (‘More Ovaltine Please!’) annnnnnnd that really doesn’t have anything to do with my rambling……

Today in my Yay…I mean…ouch! Barre Tone class, a woman I’ve never seen or spoken to before was all, “When is your baby due?”

And I was all, “February 16th.”

And she was all, “You look great! You’re tiny for being due in February!”

WIN.

This weekend is crazy.

As in I have no idea how I’m going to keep my eyes open come Sunday.

You know how guys have this weird thing with cars? The same kind of thing we girls get with purses or makeup or clothes?

The bug, I call it.

Tim has been bitten by the car bug. Again. Except, at least this time it is for a reason other than, “I want a new car.”

See, we both have small cars and my car in particular is not all all suited for driving in the winter around here nor does it have much space in the trunk for things like groceries…or strollers…or strollers and groceries…and we’ve been talking about getting a larger car that is built to handle the winter and will fit carseats and groceries and strollers and dogs and babies all in one trip.

Hence the beginning of Tim searching for a suitable replacement for me because once that conversation started I was all, “I don’t care what it is. Just pick one out and I’ll drive it.”

Seriously.

Well, no. Let me clarify: I flat out refuse to drive a mini van.

Other than that, I’m game.

So, when this car conversation started a few months ago, Tim went and did his car research and then forgot about it and then started talking about cars again and then a few nights ago he remembered this website where you can see what other people paid for the same car with the same specs you want (Truecar, I think it is…) and he played on that for awhile and found a good deal and started talking with various dealers over the past few days and where did all of that lead?

We’re going to test drive a car…an SUV…tomorrow to see if I like it.

Oh boy.

I was all, “I don’t want to drive this behemoth any farther than the dealership parking lot. I’m pregnant and forgetful and huge and driving a car I’ve never driven before? Is that even a smart idea?”

Tim’s retort: “I’m sure we can find a safe place for them to take us so you can drive it.”

Hello?! There is snow EVERYWHERE.

Anyhow, wish us luck for a good deal or whatever else it is we need for this car SUV. I don’t do these kind of negotiations. I don’t do car anything. That’s all in Tim’s job description. I just sit there and look like the helpless pregnant chick.

As for the rest of the weekend?

Tonight Tim and I are going to ‘make an appearance’ (mostly because we don’t know ANYBODY) at the annual town Christmas party. We were invited because I’m on the Open Space and Trails Board. It’s like we get to see all the governmental people…at a party.

I really don’t think this means anything other than free food.

Tomorrow?

We’re going to chop down our Christmas tree (YAY!) and haul it home to set up so it can “rest” before we get dressed and drive an hour away to this dealership who has the right SUV that includes all the things Tim picked out for me and are going to test drive the monster.

If things go well?

We’ll be coming home with a car fit for the sprout.

Well, no…technically…we’re supposed to stop at another holiday party on our way home from the car dealership to make another ‘appearance.’ It is for Tim’s work…mostly salespeople I think? And, again, mostly for the free food…or something. Maybe politics because it’s work related…

We’re undecided as to this party. Tim stayed home the past two days because he was sick…but not the OMG. I’M DYING. Man-sick kind. More like the I’m sick with a fever but I’m not on my deathbed and YOU MUST CARE FOR ME 24 HOURS A DAY kind of sick. So, I wasn’t complaining. It’s the most I’ve seen him since Thanksgiving.

Where was I?…

I think we’ve made it to Sunday?

Sunday we are decorating the house – inside and out – and the tree for Christmas.

Somewhere around all of this activity we have to find time to go to the grocery store. We’ve figured out how to do one BIG grocery shopping trip once a month, with smaller trips every now and then to replenish things like milk and bread. Except, we’re due for another BIG trip because we have no food in the house AND I’m Little Miss Martha next week, as I’ll be making cheery holiday tins filled with goodies for Tim’s direct reports and we don’t have the ingredients for the tins, either.

I was Little Miss Martha yesterday, actually. I made these glass marble ornaments and I also filled out about a million Christmas cards.

Tim was all, “I NEVER used to send out so many cards!”

And I was all, “You weren’t married then, either.”

Oh, right! My mini-marble masterpieces:

And I think they’re pretty damn cute.

You know what is completely ironic about the title of this post?

My whole point of Tourette’s was to tell you that the sprout now kicks me REALLY HARD sometimes out of nowhere. It’s like everything is quiet and I’m completely unprepared for the wallop my insides are about to receive.

And then it happens and I legit jump three feet in the air all, “OWWW!”

I’ve scared Tim more than once with my antics, even though now he’s finally starting to understand I cannot control these random outbursts.

It’s not my fault.

It’s kind of exactly like I have a physical form of Tourette’s. I just bust out in a scream or a yelp and dance around for a few seconds before I sit back down like nothing happened.

Quite comical.

Yet, I’ve been going all over the map with what I’m talking about like I actually have Tourette’s.

This?

Totally not planned.

PS? If there are any typos, kindly let me know. I decided to hit publish before I proofread anything because I just remembered that I have to go get my car washed so it looks all nice and purty for the dealership people tomorrow.

Have I ever mentioned how much I don’t like going to get the car washed?

Someone entertain me………

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10 Responses to “baby tourette’s”


  1. 1 Katie Darden December 9, 2011 at 12:36 pm

    When you go car shopping you may want to check out Honda. We accidentally took my Grandmom’s CRV off roading while in North Carolina (always remember to remove the dirt road option on your gps or it may take you on an old logging trail). It handled it as well as my brother’s Toyota truck (Philip was in charge of following the gps). I’ve driven it and it doesn’t feel like a tank. Also my dad has a Pilot that has over 200,000 miles with no major repairs so they last forever!

  2. 2 Maureen December 9, 2011 at 12:57 pm

    I need to figure out how to do one BIG grocery shopping trip. Even once a week would be good. As it is now, we go into the store, pick out some random things for the next couple days or so, and then two days later… “ohh, I guess we have to go to the store again.” It’s always after work, so we get home late, are starving but have to cook dinner for 2+ hours (because we are extremely slow at cooking) and then usually eat by about 10pm.

  3. 3 jobo December 9, 2011 at 1:32 pm

    You don’t like car washes? I love them! Used to be afraid of them haha. As for someone saying you were tiny in class today? um, yes, you are! Glad someone told you that! AND that you believed them (sorta kinda). Good luck car shopping!

  4. 4 JessSutera December 9, 2011 at 1:47 pm

    hahaha I loved this post – it was like sitting inside your head for awhile, kinda fun up in there, I must say 😉

    I love that the barre instructor said you look tiny – because you ARE! You look great. Accept it, mmk? :):):)

  5. 5 PJ December 9, 2011 at 2:43 pm

    Ooh, I love car shopping! And you should post pictures of the new SUV! (I’m partial to SUV’s since I grew up in MI and went to college in Northern NY, where 4-wheel drive is essential. Plus, that’s all my family has now – we all have SUV’s. My brothers and I have Jeep’s and my parents have Lincoln’s.)

    Also, I’ve been bad with leaving comments lately. It’s not that I want to leave you alone; but, I’ve been so busy that I haven’t even had the time to read my favorite blogs.

  6. 6 Stephanie December 9, 2011 at 4:27 pm

    LOVE your blog, but I am so mad at you!!! How can you post those kick ass marble ornaments you made, and then not give us a link or any steps for us to make them ourselves? Christmas is a time for GIVING, Jessica! So spill the details!!

  7. 7 Stephanie December 10, 2011 at 8:38 pm

    Sigh. I wish we lived in the same city. I have no friends here in TX, and I just think the world of you and Tim, even though I only know you through your blog! your blog is the ONLY one i read every.single.day. I’m hoping to save up enough money to go to the sites you are registered with and get you a small something for the sprout! Hope you are feeling well!

  8. 8 Angelia Sims December 11, 2011 at 9:48 am

    I remember the car shopping nightmare from a while ago. But, an SUV will be great! Hey, it’s not a mini-van, right?

    I forgot to tell you, I gave you an award too. I think it was Thursday’s post. I suck at giving awards.

  9. 9 Daniela December 11, 2011 at 5:39 pm

    Yupp, you’re right, your post was confusing 😉 But I’m used to that, my mom switches subjects from one half-finished phrase to another without any warning, expecting me to read her mind. So, well, I’m used to that 😉
    But then again, it’s almost midnight over here in France, I’ve travelled the weekend and am tired…

    PS: Somehow, it seems like this comment is more confusing than your whole blog post. Sorry!!

  10. 10 Daniela December 11, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    To confuse you some more, what I forgot:

    Why not a minivan?? Honestly, they are cool!
    And for the trying-out-a-car, I mean, with the automatic you guys have in every car down there in the US, I mean, driving is easy-peasy, don’t worry! ;-P


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