the “big” night (or: more about Tim’s job)

Let’s talk about Thursday night.


Nice Italian restaurant.

Just Tim, me….and thirty of his cohorts from work – including his boss – all flown in from around the country for a weeklong meeting.

Everyone in a contained space – a wine cellar – for dinner.

I was the sole spouse.

This dinner was the first time I’ve ever gone to something like this. The only reason I was there, really, was to meet everyone else. I mean, sure, I’ve attended holiday parties and events where *all* spouses and significant others were welcomed, but this was a completely different kind of function. This was like, where, when your spouse (or you) are interviewing for some super big whig job and the role of their significant other is so crucial that they’re interviewed, too, just to see if everyone is the right “fit” and to make sure the spouse will support their other half when their other half spends more time at work than at home…when they travel all the time…when their weekends are sometimes reduced to a few hours of quality time.

(Obviously, I’m already an old hat at this work-life-non-balance game)

Ok, so maybe it wasn’t THAT dramatic, but, that’s kind of how it felt.

I was introduced to everyone and shook so many hands that the corresponding faces mostly blur together. I spent a good ten minutes talking with Tim’s boss.

And, in typical fashion, what did I decide to do in preparation for the big night – other than buy a black dress suitable for a preggo belly that was originally $119 that I got for $29?!

(I’m totally bragging because OMG. D.E.A.L.)

I inhaled two monster sized bowls of Raisin Bran.

Why? Why do I torture myself so?

We sat at a table with Tim’s peers and his boss, listening to all of the “work talk” and other than holding in my farts all night (TMI but, seriously. Raisin Bran is a killer!), I got to see a side of Tim that I rarely experience:

Work Tim.

Work Tim is totally different from My Tim. He’s got a different tone in his voice. He speaks up when there’s a pressing issue and he wants his thoughts heard. He laughs…genuinely…he’s in that zone – the one where his guard is up but his personality still shines through.

That guard that is taken down the second he walks into the garage door every night after work, so he was in rare form, for me, at dinner.

Funny, nothing was really “off limits” while I was sitting amongst them all at the table. I guess they realize that it probably doesn’t matter what they say, I’ll probably hear about it, anyway.

Isn’t that part of my role as the supportive spouse?

Isn’t that what Tim needs? A (mostly) unbiased sounding board?

The entire night was full of interesting.

The most interesting?

The stuff that directly affected me, of course.

Every single person who would (probably) have an impact on the decision regarding how long we stay in Colorado that I spoke with – his boss, his boss’ counterpart, some other guy who is already in Toledo who is probably important somehow – all told me, completely unprompted, that in one way or another that A: Denver was temporary and B: asked if I was ready for Toledo.




We already knew that all roads will eventually lead to Toledo, but rarely do they go in a straight line. Others in Tim’s position (the one’s who also run manufacturing plants around the country) usually end up going a round-about way, running larger plants in various places before they eventually land in Toledo.

Granted, we have no idea what is going to happen or where we’ll be next, but the conversations seemed to have a leading edge, if you know what I mean, and based on the impression I got last night, I know – for certain – that Denver is absolutely not a permanent place for us to live and that Toledo as a next stop is a high likelihood…

Only time will tell…and we all know how much I suck at patience.

Also? Totally related but completely random?

We now have a super stocked wine cabinet.

Last weekend, before the meeting started, Tim and I went shopping with some chick from Toledo in order to fill a hospitality suite at the hotel in Denver, where the meeting was taking place, with all kinds of alcohol and snacks. The hospitality suite is the place to be after dinner to…talk about manly things…I guess?

The room in general was slightly comical. There was an L-shaped couch in the main room as the sitting area, along with a few chairs scattered about.

Think: Fifteen men. One couch.

I was allowed into the man cave (plus one other female – the hospitality suite shopping chick) Thursday night after dinner. When Tim and I walked in, I was greeted to a couch full of men, chatting.

I had no idea men would agree to get so…close?

Close or not, these manly men apparently didn’t eat or drink as much as anticipated during the week, so there were cases upon cases of beer and wine and liquor left over on Friday morning – the kinds of alcohol that you’d never buy all at once because it’s so freaking expensive and that would take Tim and I at least two years to acquire.

What happened Friday morning?

A super awesome perk, a kind of, “We’re sorry you lost your husband to the planning and execution of this meeting for the last two months…”

That perk?

First dibs on all of the leftovers!

Tim and I ate breakfast at the hotel on Friday and then loaded up our cars with super expensive wine and liquor THAT I CAN’T EVEN DRINK.

Good thing wine gets better with age, right?

I really don’t know much about liquor, so hopefully it doesn’t go…sour? Rancid? Aren’t those two things the same, in a way?…I have no idea.

My brain is tired.

But my dress was sexy!

Though my hair…not…it’s up in rollers.

Don’t even ask about the look on my face…something about Raisin Bran…

***As you laugh at my ridiculous picture, I’m currently enduring our first childbirth class. SEND HAPPY JUJU!***

14 Responses to “the “big” night (or: more about Tim’s job)”

  1. 1 Maureen November 12, 2011 at 5:52 pm

    Toledo??? blah. Sorry… I’ve grown up with a poor memory of Toledo (mainly because my weird uncle lived there and we always had a boring time, therefore Toledo = boring). But it’s not really so bad. It has a good college. Ummm… I’m trying to think of something awesome about Toledo but I can’t. Oh, it has an art museum!

    • 2 PJ November 13, 2011 at 6:40 pm

      The zoo! Toledo has a really great zoo. And if you like roller coasters – Cedar Point (the best amusement park in the country) isn’t too far away.

      I have a bad opinion of Toledo because it’s in Ohio (I’m so sorry); but it’s close to Michigan and therefore awesome lake vacations!

      • 3 Jessica November 14, 2011 at 10:17 am

        I know ZERO about Toledo…other than what most people (like you two) have to say about it. Maybe we can live close to the lake?…….whenever it is we live there….

      • 4 Maureen November 14, 2011 at 10:40 am

        Oh yeah, I forgot about the zoo! There’s also a little island on Lake Erie, kind of near Sandusky (where Cedar Point is), called Put-in Bay that has a crystal “cave” and an excellent winery.

  2. 5 Andrea November 13, 2011 at 8:04 am

    Oh man you’re going to have to leave Colorado for Ohio?! I’m sorry. That stinks.

  3. 7 Monica November 13, 2011 at 11:27 am

    The booze will hold up fine as long as it’s not opened. Hang on to it. You’ll need for Ohio.

  4. 9 lifestartsnow November 13, 2011 at 1:08 pm

    keep the booze and send it to me once i’m settled in dc ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol

    i had no idea tim is on THAT level at work. do you think you passed the “wife test”? do you think tim passed the test? i don’t really have an opinion on toledo – been to ohio and liked it. but is there any way you guys can stay in colorado until i’ve visited you??? pleeeeeaaaaaaaase?!?! like, i know, you’d totally throw your plans out of the window just for me. right? RIGHT??

  5. 11 JessSutera November 13, 2011 at 1:09 pm

    Wow, that must have been such an interesting night – I’m really digging the fact that even though Tim turns into “work Tim” when in a work environment, his personality still shines through. He’s still “your Tim” under all that and I think that’s so important, to always keep a sense of self, no matter what your job entails or where it takes you. As for Toledo? You are so calm and accepting of the circumstances his job puts you guys in, seriously it’s amazing to see such support and love from you to him. You guys are awesome!

    • 12 Jessica November 14, 2011 at 10:19 am

      It was – for sure!

      I guess I have to be calm…because I knew it was going to happen before Tim even took the job. It was one of the “if we do this, then X will happen.” So…can’t really complain…because I agreed in the beginning…

  6. 13 jobo November 13, 2011 at 8:22 pm

    Seriously, you are being really good at going with the flow with the moving around thing…that’s actually really awesome, and I am sure Tim appreciates that more than you know. And uh, hot dress. you look fabulous!

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