nothing says “forever” like a baby

I do realize that marriage…

is supposed to be THE THING that bonds you together, forever, with another person, in front of God and baby Jesus, forever and ever, amen.

Except.

That promise didn’t feel as permanent as creating – and carrying – another human being with someone.

THAT?

BONDING. EXPERIENCE.

(Literally and figuratively)

I mean – once you have a child with another person – that person will be in your life forever, regardless of any kind of previous promise you may or may not have kept.

A child makes your relationship with someone permanent.

A marriage does not.

I have no idea why this concept is so life altering to me…maybe because I’ve seen both sides of having children in a marriage that remained in tact versus one that did not.

Both sides are hard, don’t get me wrong, but it seems like the one where the marriage isn’t irretrievably broken is more stable for everyone involved. Granted, one of my parents probably would have offed the other one by now had they stayed together, so I’m not suggesting I wish that otherwise, but something about Tim and my marriage changed for me once I actually realized and accepted that we were, in fact, having a child.

It changes you.

It changes how you see your relationship – your marriage.

It changes everything.

I’ve had many a day lately where I just sit and think, “Wow. We’re in this forever. Like…FOREVER.”

When I’ve expressed this to Tim, he’s all, “Um, yah? Weren’t we already?”

Yes…but, I mean, the “forever” now is a totally different kind of “forever” versus when we said “I do.”

Forever now feels more real…more absolute…more defined…in a way I don’t think anyone would understand unless you’ve been right where I am at this very moment, because *I* didn’t even realize there could be a difference in the meaning of “forever”….until the sprout.

*****

Now, on a completely unrelated note: I’m (still) totally not trying to be a nudge but…PLEASE VOTE FOR ME!!!!

I’m still losing the Atlanta Track Club sign contest to something about stinky runners.

Something about that STILL just isn’t right.

I hear you can vote once a day until 11/11…and I also hear you have a chance to win a $50 gift card just for voting (yay!). So, if you have a spare moment, could you go (again) (I’m such a pain…I know) and pretty, pretty, pretty please vote for my sign on Atlanta Track Club’s page (Jessica B) – “Your runners high? It’s probably not coming…”? Puuhhllease?

HERE! VOTE HERE! 

Please?…with sugar and sparkles and everything warm and fuzzy on top?

I swear this begging will stop after tomorrow.

(You can vote once a day…did I mention that part already?)

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14 Responses to “nothing says “forever” like a baby”


  1. 1 Amy - Hamlet's Mistress November 10, 2011 at 9:50 am

    Lovely post. I hope I experience it someday.

  2. 3 jobo November 10, 2011 at 10:15 am

    It is mindblowing…this forever ‘thing’ and you are right, a child cements it far more than marriage, because no matter what, you are bonded by that child, together forever. That’s a GREAT thing, a blessed thing. Happy for you guys 🙂

  3. 5 JessSutera November 10, 2011 at 10:23 am

    Huh. I actually never thought of it that way until you brought it up. But wow, I guess nothing really is as forever as having a baby together. An in this case, it’s an awesome forever feeling. You two are going to be the best (and funniest) parents EVER.

  4. 7 Stephanie November 10, 2011 at 10:37 am

    Yeah so.. about the voting.. I am voting with all 4 of my facebook names… i made more so i could have farmville neighbors, when FV first came out. (i dont play anymore) So i will vote will all 4 names, every single day. BEAT THAT, OTHER SIGNS!

  5. 9 Amanda Perry @ Sistas of Strength November 10, 2011 at 11:46 am

    So true and I have thought the same thing a million times. I think it’s good you realize this and also that you have brought it up to him. You’re both in it forever. 🙂

  6. 11 bevchen November 10, 2011 at 1:02 pm

    I’ve voted :o)

    A baby is a nice kinf of forever though. You two are going to be great parents.

  7. 13 lifestartsnow November 10, 2011 at 4:13 pm

    sometimes i think you have way too much time on your hand to think… 😉 on the other hand i’m not married and not pregnant so what do i know…


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