time…so precious

Sometimes I think about drawbacks of marrying someone 13 years my senior.

There really aren’t any “bad” things.

Most of it boils down to:  He’s got more experience than me. So he’s probably on to something when he tells me what I’m doing will result in a massive backfire that will take three times as long to fix than me doing it HIS WAY the first time…

And I’m still….learning…with that whole “listening” process. He always says to me, “One day, grasshopper, you will be able to grab the stone from my hand.” That’ll be the day I come up with the correct solution the FIRST TIME instead of him hearing my usual, “Hoooney!!…heeelllp!!…it’s BROKEN…and I didn’t even TOUCH IT.”

But even so, I keep coming back to one glaring fact.


He’s 13 years older.

13 years ahead of me, down the path of life.

Tim always says he’s going to live to be 150. And I hope he does…breaks all sorts of records and stuff.

Because I could not imagine a single day without him making me laugh…or giving me a pep talk…or calming me down…or being able to reach for the phone to call him for a ONLY-HE-WILL-UNDERSTAND crisis.

He is so much a part of me…and I’m sure there are plenty of women who think they can get along JUST FINE without “a man.” But – it isn’t the “getting along” ….it’s the experience…the growing…the little moments I look back and think, “Wow.”

These types of thoughts usually come into my head when we’re fighting…or I get mad at him for something completely ridiculous. In the end, it’s never worth arguing about…though it is so hard to remember in the heat of the moment. Because in the heat of the moment, we’re both ready and willing to chuck anything and everything at the other’s emotional wall to see what sticks. No holds barred.

Time is so precious…

Sometimes I need to remind myself of that simple, yet earth shattering, fact.

Because moments like these…you can’t get those back.

T&J 1T&J KauaiT&J Engaged


21 Responses to “time…so precious”

  1. 1 Kate August 23, 2009 at 9:26 am

    So true! No matter your age, you just never know when your time might be up. This is a beautiful post!

  2. 3 whyme August 23, 2009 at 10:56 am

    you are so right on this one. I find that when I try to argue with my partner I end up laughing almost everytime, even when I know I’m right and the point I’m making is serious. Life’s too short. I’ve enjoyed reading your blog. thanks

    • 4 Jessica August 23, 2009 at 1:03 pm

      whyme: Thanks for stopping in…and it is so good you are able to laugh. So many take EVERYTHING too seriously. Laughter is a much better option…even if it makes your other half mad at the time…they’ll come around eventually and see it isn’t worth the huge explosion. 🙂

  3. 5 Kristy August 23, 2009 at 12:11 pm

    What a beautiful post. Most of my past relationships were with much older men, and I remember fondly those times I was the “young grasshopper”.

    My husband is only two years older than me, and we are stumbling along, learning those life lessons together.

    Love the second pic!!

    • 6 Jessica August 23, 2009 at 1:02 pm

      Kristy: It must definitely be a huge growing experience…learning life lessons together. We learn the lessons so differently…Tim usually seeing it in a different light because I approach things so opposite…and I see the logic behind his reasons…

      Thanks for stopping in, by the way. 🙂

  4. 7 Shannon August 23, 2009 at 2:15 pm

    With almost 15 years between us Bill and I just couldn’t find any drawbacks to that aside from the whole having kids at “his age” thing. Which I think was just a topic due to the fact that we live in the midwest and for “God’s sake I’m almost 30 and I have not reproduced on my own yet!!!!” Those thoughts did run through my mind though-one day he really would leave without me. Scary but it gives you that extra knowledge that not all people have-that time is so precious.

  5. 8 ayoinfinityline August 23, 2009 at 6:38 pm

    I just want to say great pictures! It seems like u guys fit perfectly. Thats something everyone is looking for. Looks like u really love each other! Time really is precious. Dont want to waste a min.

  6. 10 joz1234 August 23, 2009 at 7:51 pm

    I think you must not let time left worry you. Live life to the fullest, because either one of you could be taken out of this life at any moment. Love your post.

  7. 11 mcwillis August 23, 2009 at 8:27 pm

    Awww adorable post. And I love the picture with the statues! Hilarious!

  8. 13 theweightofitall August 24, 2009 at 3:42 am

    This made me smile. I have faith that I will find someone who I will want to call in those “oh-my-god-no-one-can-fix-this-but-you” moments. Reading your story just inspires me to keep looking. 😉 Thanks for reading. Congrats on your 2 year anniversary!

    • 14 Jessica August 24, 2009 at 4:39 am

      theweightofitall: you will absolutely find someone. Probably when you least expect it. 🙂

      thanks for stopping in – hope to see you again from time to time!

  9. 15 Nezzy August 24, 2009 at 8:42 am

    I am so glad you stopped by my blog. I am sooo new at all of this. Feb. of this year my very brave DIL set my emails she received from me up in a blog…said they were too good to share. I only had the 35mm with all the bells and lenses I’d used all my long married life. The kids honored me with a digital for Mothers Day and I am still figuring the technical thing out being a simple farm chick. I almost bee-bopped right through the spiderweb, catching myself I ran and grabbed the camera. I only had one shot….techie died the first shot. I just lucked out. In the words of Granny Clampett….Ya’ll come back now,ya hear!

  10. 17 justordinary August 24, 2009 at 12:07 pm

    Beautiful post, I can totally relate to a lot of what you’ve said except the 13 years …your husband is a lucky man and I’m sure he knows it 🙂

  11. 19 Daphne August 26, 2009 at 9:48 am

    Thanks for visiting my site and commenting, Jess! I loved this post of yours. I agree with another comment that said that you two seem to fit – you look like you really complement each other. It’s a valuable thing to recognize that you need to take every moment and make the most of it. Don’t let the fear of losing Tim prevent you from being happy in the here and now. Life isn’t as predictable as we think it is and some of the surprises end up being better than we could possibly hope for.

    Have an awesome second anniversary trip to Charleston!

    • 20 Jessica August 26, 2009 at 12:42 pm

      Daphne: Thanks for visiting back! Funny you say “Jess” ….Tim calls me that and then got his entire family calling me that…and eventually I was like, “MY NAME IS JESSICA!” Even though I could care less if its Jess or Jessica… I think it was a control thing…I’ve since relinquished that – not a battle to fight. 🙂

  12. 21 Daphne August 27, 2009 at 8:36 am

    Yes, ma’am, Jessica, ma’am. 🙂 Duly noted.

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