Do you remember sometime back in….oh…I don’t know….like when it wasn’t single digits outside and I could wear shorts and my bump looked like this (aka: nonexistent)?
Well, what do you think of me, NOW?
Personally, *I* think:
A: Fat face + double chin
B: Scar alert! (thanks, abnormal mole)
C: I still have TEN weeks for this thing to grow
The most awful part?
My energy level has been
close to a big, fat z-e-r-o this past week. I’ve yet to go to the gym (fail), I’ve yet to walk to dogs (double fail) and I’ve absolutely been hanging out on the couch, trying to will myself to do something other than imagine all the things I *should* be doing (win!).
I have no idea what happened between last week and this week but OMG. I feel like I’m reaching first trimester zombie status. I know baby sprout is now putting on lots of weight and all that jazz but who knew that adding fat would zap my energy all KAPOW!
He’s also quite the comedian, the sprout. Whether it is on purpose or not, he has decided that daddy’s hands on my belly = snuggle time, so, now, whenever Tim puts his hand on my belly, my bump will become all lopsided and hard right under Tim’s hand while the sprout gets all cozy and comfortable.
Oh…have I never told you that Tim has this crazy gift (as his mom called it…and she’s totally right)?
His hands NEVER. GET. COLD. I mean, NEVER. It doesn’t matter if they’ve been outside in the freezing rain without gloves for seven hours. He’ll come in and they’re still toasty warm.
Super huge bonus for everyone.
And by everyone I mean me.
Except…I think the sprout is catching on and I’m pretty sure Tim will be more eager to use those hands on the sprout once he’s made his appearance… *sigh*
Other than zero energy, I’m slightly freaking out on the inside because ten weeks until D-Day, also known as the day the watermelon squeezes out of the lemon, isn’t exactly very long. At all.
On the plus side…my weight gain over the past three weeks was only three pounds – and this was over Thanksgiving – bringing the total so far to 25 pounds (sad face). I told Tim at the doctor’s office that my original goal was to only gain 25 pounds…which, obviously, I’ve met, albeit sooner than I’d hoped. Tim was all, “Even the nurse said you were all belly.”
Yah…but…still. 25 pounds with ten more weeks to go?!
This doesn’t bode well for my psyche.
Also? Other than intermittent boob leakage, I’ve been having a lot pain down in the lady bits. As in rolling over in bed, getting out of bed or any other position that would typically require the separation of ones knees is no longer a viable option for me.
Knees must remain glued together or OMG. Fire in the hole.
I had actually figured out a system for the knees-glued-together-acrobatics and this used to be the only time I really had vajayjay pain, so it was manageable…bearable.
It hurts to walk.
Why? What changed in a week? Where did all of this ouchie come from?! I’m trying to adjust to walking without hitting door frames with my stomach and doing a half-bend contortionist type move to pick things up off the floor and live with the fact that yes, I must grunt in any attempt to get up from a seated position.
So, really, body, what I’m saying is work with me, here. I could do without the constant sore lady bits.
We may as well mention the Braxton Hicks contractions (the painless ones that just feel really weird, like someone is squeezing you from the inside) I get on a daily basis, now. They happen a lot when I bend over, so I guess I need to add that to the list of things I probably shouldn’t be doing anymore.
Apparently, these contractions mean my uterus is getting ready for prime time, so I can only imagine they’ll become more and more frequent as the days and weeks tick by.
Also, again? I need a back masseuse. Like, a permanent one. I had no idea my back would hurt as much as it currently does. It doesn’t matter if I’m standing or sitting or doing anything else in between. If I do “it” for too long? Backache.
We won’t even get into sleeping.
I kissed that wonderful piece of harmony goodbye awhile ago and with a growing bump, it just gets more and more elusive…and let me tell you: I LOVE MY SLEEP. I’ve always been able to sleep…always…so this is a huge adjustment for me that will probably take years to reconcile.
I’m growing by the day, my friends, so I cannot even allow myself to imagine what the next few weeks will bring to my ever expanding waistline…it already feels like the sprout is running out of room in there to do his daily gymnastics routine.